Every relationship has its ups and downs. To get through times that you aren't happy in a relationship, read our advice on how you can handle these moments. You know being in love but not being happy sounds like a very common stage most relationships go through. I think most people in long term relationships can . Are you in a relationship that's OK but not great, one in which you're content staying but, at the same time, not as happy as you think you could be with someone.
Signs you're not happy in your relationship
These signs will tell you if you need to end it Share fbshare twshare pinshare Comments 0 Are you not happy in your relationship? There is no magical formula to make a relationship successful. Every couple fights or bickers over small things. Sometimes they need to make adjustments or compromises to keep the bond intact. But sometimes, it is difficult to figure out whether you should continue to resolve the issues, which threatens your peace and sanity, or should you call it quits.
It is a tricky situation and it could be a life-altering decision.
It has been quite a while since you guys made love and actually enjoyed it or whispered sweet nothings to each other. Even if both of you sit idle in the same room, you have nothing to talk about and do not spend any quality time together. It is an indication that you are growing emotionally distant from each other and the relationship is not going anywhere.
Maybe, one of you want to settle down and have kids, but the mere thought of marriage gives jitters to the other partner. Or maybe, one of you want to take up a job abroad and the other person wants to stay in their hometown. When it seems both have a completely different set of life goals and it is impossible to find a middle ground, it might be a better option to end the relationship amicably than continuing it.
You no longer feel like sharing the nitty-gritty of your day with your partner, nor are you interested in knowing how their day was. There is a communication gap with your partner, and you are simply letting this void expand further. When we care about someone, we will make an effort to listen to what they have to say, consider their feelings, and find ways to compromise when we disagree.
It's a beautiful thing to see two people find a shared love language despite their differences. Early in relationships, it's not uncommon for us to put aside strong opinions and avoid arguments because we don't want to scare the other person away. As your bond strengthens, you will feel more comfortable revealing your true thoughts on topics that were previously considered off-limits.
It's normal that this transition will result in an increase in disagreements, since you're now being more genuine and your discussions have more depth. If, however, you find yourselves viciously arguing about everything from toilet paper to where you are going to eat for dinner, take a deep breath and ask yourself why this is happening. Did something change in your relationship? If you end up fighting about why you are fighting, consider talking to a couples' counselor.
If you don't think the relationship is worth that kind of commitment, it might be time to move on. You can't imagine a future together Shutterstock When we are young, we spend wayyy too much time trying to imagine what our futures will look like.
Will we get married? Will we have babies? What kind of house will we live in and when will we see our first gray hair? We talk to our friends about these all-important topics and end up having ridiculously high expectations about everything. At least we're optimistic in our youth, right?
For this reason, we often go into relationships immediately sizing up our partner, trying to determine if this is the one we will spend the rest of our lives with. Sometimes, we might even ignore their flaws just to try to make things seem more perfect than they are. It's pretty normal, for the most part! It's a huge red flag, therefore, if in our moments of thumbing through bridal magazines and carefully vetting boy and girl names for children we haven't even had!
Signs you're not happy in your relationship
Of course, use your common sense in this area. If you've only been dating for two weeks, it's completely reasonable to struggle with knowing if you feel truly compatible. If it's been two years and you still can't see a future together, something probably isn't right. You're obsessing over your ex Shutterstock When we break up with someone, it's natural to be curious about them from time to time.
You might see them comment on someone's social media page and spend a few minutes clicking through their pictures and rolling your eyes you know you've done it! You might even have mutual friends who give you updates when something major happens. As long as you don't dwell on any of it, it's completely normal. If you are spending a significant amount of time reminiscing about the "good ol' days," devoting hours to stalking them on social media, or grieving the end of a long-dead relationship, you've crossed a line.
Imagine if you discovered that your current partner was feeling similarly about one of their exes. You would be devastated and you'd also question whether you really matter to them — and you'd be justified. You've been cheating Shutterstock While you are dating, it's important to be clear about your expectations regarding infidelity. Once you've decided to be in a committed, monogamous relationship, you will need to create strong boundaries with any parties who could become problematic down the line.
This could involve ending friendships or limiting contact with certain people, but it's worth it to protect your relationship, right? When it comes to being unfaithful, everyone will have their own interpretation of what constitutes cheating.
Again, this is why it's important to have a fully transparent and honest conversation about this from the beginning. Ultimately, though, we all know deep down when we've let things go too far. Obviously, being sexually intimate is usually considered cheating but what about exchanging sexually suggestive texts or sharing personal details about your relationship with someone you've been flirting with? Here's a simple way to know if you're guilty of infidelity — the behavior makes you feel guilty and you wouldn't want your partner to find out about it.
Be honest with yourself. Have you been cheating? You already know the answer. Take action or move on Shutterstock The good news is that, even if you discover you are unhappy in your relationship, you can still make changes.
After reflection, you will be better able to pinpoint the ways in which things are lacking. Focus on improving those areas of your relationship before throwing in the towel. That way, if you and your significant other do part ways, you can say you gave it your best shot. Ultimately, though, you shouldn't stay in a relationship that doesn't meet your needs. If you've made an effort to make improvements but still feel unhappy, give yourself permission to move on.
In the end, you have to do what's right for you.