Vital Signs and Characteristics of a Controlling Personality
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Reaction to Questions People with a dominating personality often get frustrated when posed with simple questions, like when and where to meet up, what they want on their birthday, and the like. For basic questions like these, they expect you to know their wants and needs well enough to put them as a priority over your personal requirements. They also get quickly flustered about questions they don't have an answer to.
In situations like these, they often end up lying instead of telling the truth. The reason for their irritated responses to what seems like a normal question to you, is wanting to be the ones with the questions as opposed to presenting answers.
Being the one to question means controlling and steering the wheel in a conversation -- something that they are comfortable with. Incapability to Take "No" for an Answer This quality gels well with all the pushovers out there, because controlling people are known for doing things their own way.
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Making decisions for others is what such people pride themselves for doing. Sometimes, this quality does take a serious route when they start threatening you on hearing a firm "no. Destructive Criticism You will find yourself talking or even dressing the way these people want you to, because they can't stand the attention shifting to someone better than them. If you are getting compliments, they'll pull you down with sarcastic comments -- calling them "honest" remarks -- by saying that everyone is just lying.
They feel threatened by the appealing nature of others, and often encourage their peers to wear unflattering makeup, or a dress that will make them control freaks look better. Short-tempered Nature Be prepared if at all you muster up the courage to disagree with them because if you do, you are bound to be on the receiving end of their fury, ranging from crude and sarcastic, to screechy threats and displays of violence.
When you do not abide by their wishes, all they think is that you are questioning their authority, and hence they choose to throw tantrums by shunning you, or lowering your confidence by their behavior.
You Will be Surprised to Know What Causes a Controlling Personality
Unable to See Others' Happiness One of the major characteristics that such manipulative personalities display is that these people cannot stand their friends' or colleagues' success stories. Often, they themselves do not have close relations with anyone for the same reason. Their desperation to be the center of attention wherever they go, is frequently evident by the fact that they keep themselves surrounded by people, who consider themselves to be less attractive, or unsuccessful.
Insecurities, the environment of one's upbringing, or a tragic past, often play a role in a controlling person's need for dominance over others' lives. Especially in the case of love, it is definitely not about controlling someone's life to the extent of driving them up the wall. So, if you are in a relationship with a person who suffers from a similar disorder, don't ignore it until it is too late.
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Life is all about the choices we make. To have a happy life, you need to choose the right path. Or that if you express your disagreement, it may upset him or her in a big way, which would again lead to unnecessary arguments! The fear of the consequences can lead to a submissive nature resulting in an unhappy relationship and an unhappy life.
But instead of focusing on, why all this is happening to you, try focusing on why the person is doing this to you, or anyone else in his or her life. Read below to find some possible answers. A Difficult Childhood The reason why each and every person grows out to be the way he or she is at present, is because of how he or she has been brought up in the past.
Usually people tend to develop a controlling behavior if they themselves were being controlled in the past. If you try to dig into the history, usually these people tend to have very controlling parents and therefore they feel that controlling others is the right thing to do. A Loss or Hurt in the Past Another reason as to why a person wishes to control each and everything in their spouse's or children's life could be because they have had a bad experience in the past which led to a significant loss or wound in their life.
They then tend to develop this mindset that they will not let anything or anyone else hurt them, so they choose to take control of each and everything in their life so that nothing can go wrong again! Insecurities and Low Self-esteem Another very prominent reason for some people to be way too demanding and controlling is because by controlling you they can shadow their own insecurities and low self-esteem!
Vital Signs and Characteristics of a Controlling Personality
It could be possible that these people can't bear the fact that they have no control over your life and just to come out of that frustration, they tend to become dominant and aggressive over you.
May be they were never paid attention to in the past and now they want to do each and everything possible to make your life revolve around them. For the Sake of Ego and Pride Some people just choose to become controlling and dominant for the sake of their 'so-called' pride and ego.
These people feel that they should have an upper hand on the relationship so that you can't crush their ego and pride. They want you to get accustomed to their expectations and way of living rather than them to adjust according to you. There can be a bad experience of a controlled relationship in the past, or they may do it just for the fun of it.