Sacrifices of a relationship

7 Signs You’re Sacrificing Too Much In Your Relationship

sacrifices of a relationship

Relationships are wonderful until they're not. While most relationships require work, the difference between sacrifice and compromise can. Close relationships require sacrifice. Here are seven questions to ask yourself before you give up too much. A few months ago, I wrote about 7 Things You Shouldn't Sacrifice for a Relationship, including emotional needs, communication and self-worth.

Print Your spouse comes home from work and excitedly tells you that she just was offered a promotion—in another state. Do you quit your job and move away from your family to an unknown city so that she can pursue her career ambitions? In fact, many people include sacrificing in the very definition of what it means to truly love another person—and indeed, research has shown that couples are happier and more likely to remain in their relationships if the partners are willing to sacrifice for each other.

Sometimes that sacrifice can be life-changing, such as deciding to move to a different state in order to be with your partner; other times it might be something small and seemingly mundane, such as seeing an action movie instead of the comedy you would have chosen.

I often find myself weighing my need to be true to myself—why should I be the one giving up what I want? Advertisement X Your guide to more connection, compassion, and kindness this month Sacrifice also raises questions of power: Over time this imbalanced pattern of sacrifice may lead to an imbalance of power in your relationship—a recipe for long-term unhappiness and resentment.

In short, research by social psychologists such as Emily Impett, Paul Van Lange, and Caryl Rusbult suggests that sacrificing for someone you love may show them you care and may even make you feel good about yourself. But their studies also reveal that if you find yourself always being the one who sacrifices—or if you feel forced to make a sacrifice—then you should tread with caution.

Based on this research, I offer seven questions you may want to ask yourself when deciding whether or not a sacrifice is worth it. How committed are you?

Is this the person you plan to spend forever with, or do you still harbor reservations? According to Van Lange, commitment may be one of the most important precursors to sacrifice. In order for a big sacrifice to be worth it, you should make sure that you are invested in the relationship and confident about your future together.

Nothing is certain, of course, but a sacrifice becomes much more palatable when it helps bring you closer to the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. Would your partner do the same for you? While you are deciding whether or not to move across the country to let your spouse take his promotion, your spouse must decide whether or not to sacrifice his promotion in order to let you keep your job.

10 Things You Should Never Sacrifice for a Relationship

Has your partner been willing to sacrifice for you in the past, or expressed his willingness to sacrifice in the future? In the current situation, are you working together to figure out what is best, or does your partner simply expect you to change your life to accommodate his?

  • 1. Freedom.
  • When Are You Sacrificing Too Much in Your Relationship?
  • 2. You concede too often.

If your partner assumes that you are the one who must choose to sacrifice, without assuming any of the same responsibility on his end, think twice. Does one of you want it more?

7 Signs You’re Sacrificing Too Much In Your Relationship

When a situation requires sacrifice from you or your partner, the two of you may not be equally invested in the outcome. As you navigate the situation, make sure you are both clear about your own desires and priorities. In addition, by not realizing that you are incurring a cost for the sake of the relationship, your partner might not understand when you want her to return the favor the next time a sacrifice is called for.

Finally, it is important to know if your partner disagrees with you and does not see your actions as a sacrifice.

10 Things You Should Never Sacrifice for a Relationship

Even though this person deserves love and kindness, you need to cut ties with the person to allow them to heal on their own. Controlling behavior suggests that the person does not feel comfortable with him or herself, and this definitely needs to be worked out before he or she commits to any long-term relationships. Never change yourself for someone else; the right person will love you for nothing less than your full, authentic self.

Also, the right person would never want you to change, because they truly enjoy your genuine essence, without you having to change a thing.

When Are You Sacrificing Too Much in Your Relationship?

You need someone who will match your vibration and bring vibrant energy into your life, not someone who leeches the energy from your life. Do you enjoy the company of your partner; do you laugh, play, act like kids, and try new things together? A relationship always comes with disagreements from time to time, but even after a long time of being together, you still should be able to do activities that bring out the inner child in both of you.

An ideal partnership consists of two people on the same mission, supporting each other every step of the way. Or, just two people who have different dreams, but still encourage and cheer each other on.

sacrifices of a relationship

Your guy or girl should make you feel a deep sense of calm that makes you forget about the chaos around you. If they make you anxious, nervous, or angry a majority of the time, they will only weaken your own vibration and cause you to become vulnerable to negative energy.

Your partner should have peace within him or herself, and reflect it onto you as well.

sacrifices of a relationship