13 Tips To Make A Good Relationship Great - mindbodygreen
Do a Google search on how to get your best body and you'll be inundated with pages of training tips. For those who want to take that same. I am limited in my ability to cook, but one recipe that I like to think I understand pretty well is one that turns out a happy, healthy relationship. Like any good meal, a relationship also requires the right ingredients to work and w.
It's a red flag. If a couple doesn't argue, it is a sign of distrust. One or both members of the relationship are avoiding confrontation, and dismissing their own thoughts and feelings to please their partner in order to escape the discomfort of discourse. These relationships will not last because there is an absence of trust and an overwhelming presence of fear. Examine your relationship and ask these questions: Do each of us have the ability to listen and sift through the words, the tears or the yells to see the heart of what our partner is trying to communicate to us?
Are we willing to step outside of our desires to be right and validate each other's feelings? For those who are afraid of confrontation, focus on the solution, because it's not about the argument, it's the resolution that matters.
Healthy relationships allow space for discomfort, because they know their partner is equally as committed to finding a solution. What destroys a relationship is the need to win. What strengthens a relationship is the ability to listen. An argument will dissolve when the people having the argument feel heard. When each person feels heard, there is peace. When there is peace, there is perspective. With perspective comes an apology. Giving an apology is important, but the acceptance of the apology is more important.
How does the recipient accept the apology? Does he or she accept the apology and release the residue that can lead to a terminal grudge and resentment? If he or she doesn't accept the apology, contempt will seep into the relationship. Once contempt is present, the relationship is over.
- Recipe for a good relationship
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Fighting fairly and honorably is an art. It is a lifelong practice. When partners are committed to the relationship, they will devote to communicating well and approach their disagreements as an opportunity to improve their partnership. Compromise A relationship is only as happy as the least happiest person in it, and the relationship is happiest in the middle of the two people in it.
Mature participants of a relationship know sometimes one person has to travel a little farther to the center than the other. They are willing to make the trek, because they trust that the other will do the same when it is their turn. When compromise is necessary ask yourself, "What matters more to me, my want to get my way or my need for peace?
Recipe for a good relationship
What do I need to do to create harmony right now? Understanding You may know your partner now, but you weren't born into his or her family.
You didn't experience his or her life firsthand. Everyone is formed and conditioned by their circumstance.
We are taught how to communicate and function whether directly or indirectly by our parents. You and your partner come to your relationship with different needs and ways of communicating.
As his or her partner, it's imperative you are understanding and accepting of your differences. Instead of expecting them to communicate how you do, study them like a foreign language and learn their language with the same passion you show your favorite hobby. This will keep you from entering the gates of judgment and frustration, as you learn to "speak their language" and love them the way they need to be loved.
Patience No one belongs to you. You can't control anyone either. Despite how hard you try to persuade or manipulate another to respond and react in the way you want, they won't and they don't. Everyone thinks, feels and acts in their own way, on their own time. If you try to rush someone's process or push them to do something they don't want to do, they will feel pressured.
And let me say, here and now, we will not be going back to spend any time in the care of Bull short for Bullet. Advertisement Each of them, servers serving up food, each affecting our dining experience, and one leaving us happily digesting while the other left us holding our bellies and scratching our heads.
As most of us know, relationships are built on words, deeds wrapped in our body language and tone, all of which we rely on to help us navigate communication with one another. At that moment, Steve looked across the tiny restaurant table at me, and I think he read me as I envisioned Bull's pen leaking onto Bull's hand, the ink finding its way onto the overshadowed face before us.
7 Ingredients of a Healthy Relationship
It would be our 36th anniversary in a couple weeks, and in that very spirit, the day before, we had been transformed for a few seconds into royalty. Imagine Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip after coronation, even as we were presented a plastic tray overflowing with helpings of Red's Eats fish 'n' chips as Red herself took the time to lean in, poking out of the Sheepscot Riverside seafood-shack window with a smile just as wide as that waterway, simply to invite the long line of summer patrons to join in wishing us not only an enjoyable lunch but another 36 years filled with delicious eats as it were.
No judgment for what had been ordered up. Bull's chip was larger than the shoulder it had evidently nicked; any sinew of courtesy was smaller than a Cornish game hen, and it was clear to us that we were essentially being questioned over a menu choice. I mean, how much can two sides of slaw really be? Bull's combative approach had killed our appetites, and we drove away with a bad taste in our mouths. The real question here is not whether any particular waitstaff of any particular place understands best how to serve its customers, but there is a kind of corollary to the relationship in general.
Bull served up a crappy dish of attitude while Red had chosen to make it an experience for each and every person who showed up at the order window. In both cases, we had taken away stories that stemmed from the relationship that had begun to form. And as parts of a whole, each of us must deliver ingredients to any relationship.
It got me thinking how important communication is to a good romantic relationship. If trust, humor, tact, patience and equal parts of respect and compassion are not included in the mix, it's a recipe for disaster, doomed from the start. Bull had us on defense, questioning our our own moves before we'd even had a chance to look at one another across the candlelit table, sip our drinks and anticipate our first bites.
So here's the rub: If you want to make a good relationship, think of the recipe for the kind of service you prefer to have when you are at any eatery. Red was eager to share a smile, encourage some laughs, learn something about us, allow us to make our own decisions, trust in our wishes, anticipate that we'd figure out how to eat on our own, wish us well and, quietly, without presumption, prepare for the unexpected just in case we would need a doggie bag or extra condiments, or would come to decide that the food was not to our liking, and, if it was, simply applaud our accomplishments.
May I get you anything else? Try Red's approach as an example for how best to treat people. Steer away from Bull's. Here are 10 quick tips to a delicious relationship. Listen to your gut. It's your second brain, and it may be trying to tell you something. While you're at it, honor your partner's point of view, too. How do you feel about the relationship? Are you feeling nurtured or are you constantly hungry?
Do a value-systems check.
What are those systems telling you? How do you feel after you spend time together? Is the heartbeat a happy one or one fraught with disappointment or anger? What kinds of worldview do you each have? Kids someday or sans kids forever?