Is 'taking a break' ever a good idea for a couple? - Chicago Tribune
This will help set expectations and hopefully set the path for a smooth break. This is also Have you ever taken a break from a relationship?. a break up? And why breaks can potentially help a relationship. Even if we think we want a future with our partner, we aren't percent convinced. We are . Does anyone ever take a break and then continue with a successful relationship? With the help of relationship coach and psychotherapist, Toni Coleman, LCSW.
Too often, couples take a break but never talk about how it will play out in real, concrete terms, Davin said. What is the purpose of taking a break? Will we be staying in contact, dating other people, working on ourselves and thinking about getting back together? Make sure you've come to an agreement on dating other people.
Why taking a break could save your struggling relationship
You don't want to hear about a Tinder date your partner went on from a friend. While establishing ground rules for the break, thoroughly discuss your feelings on seeing other people, said Marni Feuermana couples therapist based in Boca Raton, Florida.
Recognize that sometimes a break brings a couple one step closer to an actual breakup. Yes, sometimes taking a break is a half measure that eventually leads to the couple splitting up, Feuerman said.
If your relationship is in poor shape, a break can only serve as a Band-Aid for so long. For many people, proposing a break is a 'softer' way to say they truly wish to just break up.
Know that if you communicate and are determined to stay together, a break can do a world of good. If your relationship is relatively healthy and your intention is to make room for self-growth, taking a break can absolutely strengthen your bond, said R. Scott Gorntoa marriage therapist based in Plano, Texas. Set a date where you come together and decide what your next step will be. If you have any expectation to get back together in the future, both people in the relationship should set the ground rules for the duration of the break.
Can you get involved with others? Will you two still call and text each other whenever you please?
Why taking a break can be really beneficial for a struggling relationship | Metro News
What's the time frame? These questions need to be asked, Sherman said.
Often couples may arrive at the agreement to take a break together if the lull in the relationship is too obvious to ignore. But when it's only one partner who wants the break, he or she should be warned that the pendulum of power may swing during the course of the supposedly temporary separation.
The partner who proposed the break initially might go crawling back, only to find that the other person has moved on. You may be asking for trouble. The act alone of requesting a break could do irreversible damage to a relationship, especially if the other person feels blindsided by the news. Don't be too quick to change who you are. Partners on the receiving end of the "I want to take a break" announcement shouldn't approach the separation with the assumption that they can erase the issues that existed before if only they change themselves.
Experts provided suggestions for how to help revive a romance that's derailed as well as the red flags that say it's time to wave goodbye.
Does 'Taking A Break' Ever End Well? Here's What Marriage Experts Say | HuffPost Life
Express your feelings in the moment. This will lead to an explosion — like someone declaring they need a break — when discussing each problem along the way could have thwarted the separation altogether.
Don't assume problems will fix themselves. Time can heal some wounds, but this isn't a philosophy to follow if you want a relationship free of resentment and pent-up frustration. Address each problem head on. Seek a couples counselor if you can't facilitate discussion yourself, said psychotherapist and relationship coach Toni Coleman. Don't let your relationship become "on-again, off-again.
Coleman said she sees this pattern far too often with couples who "stay together for the wrong reasons," break up and then get back together hoping the situation will be different — only to find it is the same. Continually breaking up and getting back together prevents both partners from finding healthy relationships. Don't try to relive the past.