Meet the tanners spoof text

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meet the tanners spoof text

NOT READY TO DONATE? STAY UP TO DATE ON THIRTEEN'S HIGH QUALITY , INNOVATIVE PROGRAMS -- SIGN UP FOR E-MAIL UPDATES. SIGN UP. Apr 21, Actress who played D. J. Tanner fake texts with Mary-Kate and Ashley about the Netflix revival, cigarettes and their fashion line in “Funny or. Tanner established a protocol for communicating, a combination of texts and email. He told Matt how to set up a spoof email. “Get a throwaway phone for texting.

Howard did a live commercial read and went to break after that. They played a phony phone call the guys made to a guy with Bigfoot trying to get a job as Santa. Howard came back and said he has Miley Cyrus there. He said he's very excited. Robin was singing along to the Marvin Gaye song. She said she will continue to do things like that.

Howard said Miley is there and she's very busy with Saturday Night Live and other things. He said that he was promoting her as an international recording star. Miley said thank you very much. Howard said it was very nice of her to do the song with Robin. Miley said it was an honor and a privilege.

She said she did a song with George Clooney and Bill Murray and that was great. She said Rick Ross was supposed to be playing Santa but he never showed up. She said they were Santa-less. She said that they did the song and had fun doing that. Howard asked if she likes recording songs like that.

Miley said she prefers working with Robin who just goes right for it without warming up. Howard said Robin was intimidated a bit with Miley. He said that she took 20 minutes to do the song.

Miley said she was doing amazing ad libs and things. She said that is the meaning of soul and she didn't worry about anything. Robins said Howard often asks how many takes it takes and she says it's just one. Howard asked Miley about doing the duet with Elton John. He said he watches that frequently. Miley laughed thinking about that. Howard said he really does that. He said he's also into this new video she has out. He said you can see her ass in the video.

Miley said you can use that to your advantage. She said it makes people watch the video. She said you lure them in with the ass. She said she always uses the ass. Howard said that's what got him but the song was good too. Miley said they flew to Ukraine to do the video. She said they work hard over there. Miley said they got to do it for real instead of CGI. She said everything is so fake now and they were able to do all of this stuff where they shut down roads and bridges.

She said they had some stuff drawn up for the video and they had an ass shot and they had to do it. She said her ass was freed.

Howard said he likes this song a lot too. He said he's going to be working with Mark soon. Miley said she heard that from Mark. Howard asked why it's ''featuring'' Miley. Miley said that she went in and wrote this in a couple hours and she was gone. She said the night before it released he was still in there perfecting it.

She said he had some ideas for the song. She said she wrote the verses and she made it more authentic. She said that it has a country root and some disco feel to it. Howard asked if this is what she's doing on Saturday Night Live.

She said they are. She said they have Sean Lennon there with her too. She said it's goose bumps all over the place with the song. Howard said he always hears that Sean is a musician but to see him with her on Saturday Night Live is fantastic.

He asked how that came about. Miley said she did an album with the Flaming Lips and he's close with them. She said they did a song with Yoko.

She said he sings on that and he sounds like his father. She said that makes it hurt in the best way. She said that it's just so true to where they are now when they sing that. Howard asked Miley about her house burning down in the fires in California.

Miley said she hasn't had time to think about it. She said she hasn't gone back there yet. She said she was traveling at the time. She said she was in Ukraine and filming in South Africa. Howard asked if she's filming Black Mirror there. Miley shook her head but said she can't say what she was doing out there. She said that she's got a lot of lawsuits so she's trying to avoid one. She said that she has been sued over so many of her songs and things.

Howard said it costs a fortune to fight that too. He said that has to be a bummer. Miley said she came home and her mom threw her a party. She said she didn't want to be distraught over her house.

She said she didn't want to see it for her birthday. Howard asked how her mom is doing. Miley said she's great. She said to say hello. Howard said she still looks great. He said she looks like she could be her sister.

Miley said she knows and it's depressing. She said that her sister went out with her and some guy was hitting on her. She said that it helps a lot though. She said her mom would get things done for her so it helped.

She said her mom stood up for her and almost punched someone for her. She said the DJ said the phones don't light up for her like they do with the Jonas Brothers. Miley said her mom almost jumped over and punched the guy. Howard said Miley was crediting her mom with getting her back into smoking weed. Miley said she did. She said that in an interview and her mom got on her about that. Howard said she was trying to get off of it and then her mom got her back into it.

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Miley said her mom was having fun and partying with it and she was having more fun than she was. She said she was so funny and laughing and it looked fun. Howard asked if it was a big deal when she got back into it. Miley said it wasn't a big deal. She said it's like riding a bike. She said she used to smoke weed and go sky diving. She said she could never do that again. Howard said she sky dived? She said she did one time. She said she had a reporter smoke weed and jump out of an airplane to torture him.

She said she agreed to do that interview based on being able to do that with him. Miley said that you do the sky dive and you can't believe you did it when you land. She said when you have the chute pulled it's really jarring. She said she kind of fell when she landed. She said the guy fell on top of her. She said that was the worst part. Howard asked if she was thinking she could die. Miley said she was saying some crazy stuff up there.

She said you think about a lot when you're falling. She said that she was quoting a bunch of weird stuff falling. She said she got too deep.

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Howard asked Miley about her house burning down and how she gave half a million dollars to help people rebuild their homes. Miley said that there are a lot of people who live there who don't have a lot of money. She said that some of those houses are a lot older and they pass them along for generations. She said there are a lot of locals.

She said they're all displaced now and it's the holidays. Miley said she's lucky that the schools made it through the fires. She said she wanted to make sure the kids had a normal life and they can keep going and seeing their friends every day. Howard said she has 7 dogs and some horses.

She said she has 2. She said she has some pigs and 3 cats. Howard asked what happened with them during the fire. Miley said her boyfriend, Liam, is so great. She said that she learned that this is why you pair up. She said that he put two pigs in crates and took them out in crates. She said he was able to save them all. She said she was glad she wasn't there because you think it's a crying wolf when you hear about a fire out there.

She said she felt she got this sense of community and relationship from this. She said she doesn't have that a lot. She said she feels more connected to humanity now. Howard said that the good part is that at least she was affected as everyone else. She said she was. She said you have to remember that when you're in this industry. She said she's been lucky to have her mom there for her. She said that she would protect her from people.

She said she was always right about those people. Howard asked when she gets to see her boyfriend. Miley said that it's tough. She said they're both very busy. She said that things are tough out in Malibu right now.

Howard said it has to be tough losing all of those things in the house. Miley said she had her song writing book in the house. She said she lost that. Howard asked why her man didn't save that. Miley said he saved his camera and his laptop. She said they do have a lot saved on the computer. She said that he saved her cats too even though one of them ran away. She said that he was able to save both. She said he got a lot of action from that.

Howard asked how that works. Miley said that's what Facetime is for when they're not together. She said that she went home to have sex with him too though.

Howard asked if she has ever thought about taking a year off and just banging and having some time off with the animals. Miley said she has taken time off but it's maybe 2 months.

She said she has an amazing life. She said they have to have Howard over if he's ever out there. She said they have an amazing chef.

She said Liam can eat and eat and he gets more ripped. She said it's not fair. She said he will wake up not being able to open her eyes from eating too much salt. She the brothers can run for miles and not be out of breath.

She said that she went on a bike ride with him and this woman who looked went flying by her. Howard said she has to be in shape for her videos. Miley said she'll work out hard for like a week. She said they made this video that was kind of political.

She said that she's doing promotion for it and she's on Instagram again to promote it. She said she was off of it for a while. She said she rebooted that. Howard said she has like 74 million followers or something so that's a big business. Miley said she just wanted to start fresh. She said if you show little girls playing with bullets and things like they have in the video they weren't getting views. She said it's really disappointing.

Miley said it's something she has to go home and think about. She said it feels like she did a social experiment without trying. Miley said he likes coming to his show because she feels that Howard is really listening to her. Howard said he is. He said that he watched her video for her ass but he is listening to her.

Howard asked if this Saturday Night Live thing is big for her. Miley said she's just the musical act today. She said that she may be in a sketch but she's not sure. Howard asked if she's going to get advice from Pete Davidson about his relationship with Ariana. Miley said she should get some. Howard said they were up there and then they broke up. Miley said it must have been Howard that caused the break up.

Miley said that she has asked Ariana to do tuff with her and she's done a bunch. She said that she's always there for her. Howard asked if she's really a friend. Miley said that they text things and they'll go back and forth talking about things.

Howard asked if she wrote her after her breakup with Pete. She said she did but it was a bunch of Emojis. She said a picture can say it all. She said that Liam doesn't use them though. Howard said she's a poet and she's not using them in texts. Miley said she has no one's number saved in her phone so she doesn't know who is texting her.

Howard said his kids will send him Emojis and he doesn't know what they're saying to him. Miley said you don't have to know. She said that's what's great about Emojis. Howard asked what she sent to Ariana. Miley said she sent pussy hearts so it almost looked like she was hitting on her. She said Ariana wrote back clouds. Howard asked what they mean. Miley said she has no idea. She said she thinks that she was saying she was okay and she's here. Howard said maybe her head was in the clouds.

Howard said he doesn't know what to write back to people so maybe he'll send clouds. Howard said he finally gets Emojis. Howard said it hits him like a ton of bricks. Howard asked Miley about going to Saturday Night Live and the meeting over there. Howard said she may be in a sketch. Howard said she's doing the Mark Ronson song. She said Mark will be there. Howard played some of the song Nothing Breaks Like a Heart.

Howard said he feels like her style is changing. He asked if she knows the lyrics. Miley was singing along with it. Robin said that's a great mix. Miley said Mark is genius at making a classic song sound modern and new.

Howard said he's hoping he can do that for him too. Miley said that it sounds like something you've heard but it also sounds like something you don't hear right now.

Howard asked what she'll be wearing there. Miley said she likes to balance that feminine and manly thing. She said she'll be wearing a men's track suit with no shirt under. She said she'll send pictures to Howard. She said then he can send her some Emojis. Howard asked if she rehearsed with Sean Lennon.

She said she has and they're going to record the song today and put it out. She said Mark asked him to do it with them and that's how they got that set up. Howard said it's weird being John's son and wanting to sing. She said it's almost a no win.

Miley said he's so talented though. She said that he inherited the magic. Howard said he's looking forward to seeing this on Saturday Night Live. Howard said Miley and Mark's new single is out now. He said that she's going to be on Saturday Night Live this week too. Howard said the real reason she's here is for the song she did with Robin. Howard said he's a little jealous of Robin. He said he doesn't sing as good as Robin.

He said that she has a very special style. Howard said she announced that this was it for her. Robin said this is it because it won't get better than this. She said this is her first retirement. Howard said she didn't have a good experience in the recording session.

He said she was given a lot of direction and she didn't like that. Miley said that she sounded so free. Robin said she had all of these heads and voices. Miley said she gets that. She said it has to be fun. Howard said Robin powered through and magic happened. He said he's excited to play this now. Miley said she hasn't heard it yet. Robin said she hasn't either. Howard said this is it.

He said it's a holiday classic. Howard said they should fly to Ukraine and film a video for it with Miley's ass hanging out. Howard played the song and started laughing right away. Miley started the song off with her amazing voice and then Robin comes in with her off key mess. Miley said she likes that Robin had no care for timing. After the song Howard said congratulations to both of them.

He said they have chemistry that can not be beaten. Howard said this was the best Christmas gift ever. Miley said she can't wait to play this on repeat forever at home. Howard said Robin is available for Saturday Night Live if she needs her. Robin said sure, why not. Howard asked if she would ever do a movie like A Star is Born. Miley said that she is exciting about the project that Howard mentioned earlier.

Howard said that's Black Mirror. Miley said that she says she never wants to do something and she ends up doing it again. She said she's been working on her music a lot.

She said she can't say too much but she hates anything she does. She said she hates anything she has ever done. Howard said he is happy to hear that. Miley said she doesn't hate what she did with Robin though. She said that job she was talking about was a job she loved. She said she left there thinking she had a great time and did a great job. She said she can't wait for them to see it. She said that she learned a lot during that time. She said that she might love it for the memory she has for it.

Howard said he'll have to watch it. Miley said it's the first thing she's proud of. Howard asked if she took one of the kids from The Voice and paid for their house. Miley said that Janice Freeman should have won the show. She said people love the stories on the show. She said she had so much struggle. She said she's been going through breast cancer and lupus treatments at the same time.

She said she's a little older than the kids on the show. She said she didn't have a house of her own and she was sleeping on the floor at one point.

She said she didn't want to use that story on the show. She said she did that song Shine on the show and she was doing rock songs and they weren't sure America was ready for that. She said that they're working on a new record with Brandi Carlile and she's sticking with her. She said she has to stick with her.

Howard said she really believes in her. Miley said you end up with 20 people on your team during a season of the show. She said that she hates confrontation and that kept her from doing Howard's show for so long.

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She said that the shittiest part of the show is that if you don't turn your chair around they turn you around at the end of the show. She said she doesn't like that because you have to tell the person why you didn't turn around.

She said sometimes you can't see the magic. She said the voice may not match up and you really should see the person and hear the singing. Howard said it's great that she's helping that woman out. Miley was talking about how there are shitty people out there and she has been very lucky.

She said that she hasn't had anyone do things to her like this MeToo movement is bringing out. She said she felt her age and not so much her gender the whole time.

Howard said she's only 26 now and she's been around a long time. He said he would think she was older based on how long she's been around. Miley said she was 13 and had people telling her what she should be wearing. She said that she was the one who was picking that stuff. She said that people are kind of afraid of her. Howard asked about the house burning down and he heard that she lost her wigs and she was upset about that.

Miley said that they're all fake and she just said that they were probably flammable and they made the fire worse. She said the one thing that she lost was her Elvis shrine. She said she's been collecting that stuff a long time. Howard asked what she lost. She said she lost a Harley Davidson motorcycle doll thing. She said that her grandfather had passed that down.

She said that she would say good night to Elvis every night and that probably upsets Liam. Howard asked if she really likes him. She said that she does. She said that her dad would play his movies and music and that reminds her of her dad. Howard said he's going to watch her on Saturday Night Live this week. He said he'll sit in front of the TV to see her. He thanked her for doing that song with Robin. Miley said that Robin can't retire. She said the industry can't lose a voice like that.

Howard said that's what he told her. Howard asked if Miley gets nervous doing shows like Saturday Night Live. She said she got nervous doing Howard's show last time.

She said she likes performing with other people. She said that way you're not stranded alone. Howard asked if she has hung out with Elton John. She said she did in Vegas and he's the best. Howard asked if she has legal pot that she smokes. Miley said she was growing it out in California. Howard said he heard her mom wants to start her own weed company. She said she's doing weed candles. She said that her mom hates that she tells all of this stuff.

She said she told her to call it Miley's Mama's. Howard said how about Hanna cannabis. Miley didn't seem to like that. Howard wrapped up with her and went to break a short time later. Howard came back and said that so many people are calling in loving Robin's song. He took a call from a guy who said he wanted to say that they did a remarkable job with their performance. Howard said Miley said she loved working with Robin. Howard said Robin saved Christmas by doing that song. He said it really made his day.

He asked if it was worth it. Robin said not at all. She said she can hear her discomfort in her voice. Howard took a call from Adam Barta who said he would like to treat Robin like a queen in the studio. He said just look at what he did with Tan Mom.

He sad she has to be treated like a queen in the studio. Robin said he has no idea what she's trying to do either. Howard said that Robin isn't available.

He said go work with Tan Mom. Howard said that they had so much fun yesterday and today. He said he went back and listened to that show yesterday. He said he decided that the lie detector was correct and High Pitch Erik is gay. He said he's very child like and he has a limited IQ. Robin said Fred summed it up best. He said he's too stupid to answer the questions. Howard said the video is up now and you can see for yourself what happened with Erik.

Howard said this whole week has been fun. Howard took a call from a woman who asked if he would be a good Oscar host. He said he knows what he's good at and it's not that. He said he can't sit there and massage jokes to suit that style of audience.

He said it would be very difficult for him. He said a lot of people there don't get him or like him out there either. He said you have to be beloved out there. He said now they're looking for someone safe to do that job. Howard said they have guys there fighting in Afghanistan and places like that and they don't honor them. He said there's too much irony in that whole thing. He said he wouldn't host a show like that.

Robin asked what the caller is thinking. She said she wants Adam Barta to win an Academy Award. Howard said they should be honoring the fire fighters who fought the fires in California and things like that.

Prank Starbucks Cup Bit. He said that this country is Christian. He said in they said the Starbucks cup wasn't Christmas enough. He said that Trump said there was a war on Christmas. He played a clip of Trump talking about how he wouldn't buy from them. He said maybe they should boycott them. He even said he'd end the lease in his building.

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Howard said in the had a green cup and they had people together in a group and conservatives were saying that wasn't Christmas enough. He said that they had two hands on one cup a year later and they said that was gay. He said they're still in the Trump building by the way. Howard said they created their own Starbucks cup and painted a dreidel, a rabbi and the Star of David on the cup.

He said they have Jesus in a tiny image on there. He said it's really tiny. He said they showed it to a husband and wife on the street first. He played the audio of Sal interviewing the people and they were very offended by that cup.

Howard said they found two black gentlemen who weren't too happy about that either. Howard played that clip and the guys were going nuts over that. They were saying that this was some racist shit.

Robin said they read a lot into nothing. Howard said next year they'll have Richard's asshole on the cup with that thing hanging out of it. Howard had fake Donald Trump on the phone who said that his presidency has picked up for a third season. Hoar said he's not sure that's how it works. Trump was talking about the Mueller thing and kept telling Robin to stop talking. He said he might start a trade war with Minnesota next year.

He said he may deport Howard back to Jew Zealand. He had a bunch of jokes like that. Howard let him go after a couple of minutes. Howard said he was watching the news and he was wondering if Trump might be charged with something by Mueller. Robin said give that up. She said he won't be charged with anything. Robin said if you tune to the next channel they have him free. He played some of that.

Howard said that was very nice. Howard had High Pitch Erik on the phone. He told him that he had a lot of feedback yesterday. Erik said that Elephant Boy is tweeting about him starting trouble with him.

Howard asked what he's doing that's so bad. Erik said that he squashed the beef with him. He said now he's saying stuff about him. He said he's saying he's gay. Howard said he is gay so what's the problem.

Erik said he doesn't have to start trouble with him. Gary said Fred tweeted ''Welcome to the gay lifestyle. He said that the two of them can date now. Erik said he's not attracted to him. Howard asked how his first night as a gay man was. Erik said he took a nap after the show and that was about it. Howard said they found out he's gay yesterday.

Erik said he's bisexual. Howard said he wanted Chris to rub his cock. He said that's gay. Erik said his cock was hurting. Howard said Elephant Boy was welcoming him to the gay lifestyle and that wasn't an insult. He said he should say he's proud to be in the gay lifestyle.

Erik said Elephant Boy has him blocked anyway. He said he has to stop writing that stuff. Howard said he's out but he's not proud. He said they don't want him getting arrested again.

He said he has to just jerk off to whoever he wants to. Erik said Donnie Wahlberg. Howard said that's it then. Erik asked if Beth heard the show. Howard said she did not. Howard said if she found out Erik was after him she might get jealous. Howard asked if he's going to find a boyfriend. Erik said that he's waiting for Donnie to get divorced.

Erik asked if he heard about Kathie Lee Gifford. Howard said they talked about it yesterday. He said they say in the paper that Jenna Bush will be replacing her.

Howard told Erik to work on his diet over the holidays. He said he has to work out if he wants Donnie. Erik said he will.

Howard let him go after that. Howard said that Matt Pinfield got hit by a car. He said he works up there at Sirius. He said that he was on MTV too. He said Matt was hit out in California.

He said he is expected to recover from the accident. He said TMZ says it was not a hit and run. Howard said Matt seems like a nice dude. He asked if he still works there. Gary said he's doing well from what he hears from a mutual friend. Howard said look at Gary with the friend who visits Matt. Howard read some email about High Pitch Erik's lie detector test.

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He had a bunch of positive feedback about the segment. Howard said a lot of people were upset that Erik is gaining weight again. He said people were demanding that he give money back to the people of New York.

Howard said Erik is mentally slow so he's not getting a job anywhere. Howard said he thinks that Fred was right about him being into celebrities. Howard said someone wrote in saying that Erik is a republican and they don't like gay people so that's why he's having such a hard time with it. Howard said that everyone loved Ed Torian. He said people called him solid gold. Howard said Robin also got a lot of feedback about Robin retiring from singing.

He said everyone thought that the international superstar was David Hasselhoff. Robin said no to that. Howard read some other email about Robin's retirement and some people agreed that she should get out if she's not happy with the producers.

Howard said someone wrote in saying she has to get over herself. Howard said some people wrote in about Sarah Huckabee Sanders calling in. He said they like that. Howard said someone called her an impersonator. He said he didn't know she was an impersonator.

Howard said that people were upset about Ronnie after they played that stuff with him and Stephanie. Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Elephant Boy voice. Sour Elephant Boy said something unintelligible. His impression was very good. He sounded just like Elephant Boy.

Howard said he wishes him and his whole family a merry Christmas. Sour Elephant Boy was singing some Christmas songs himself.

He played that quick song. Howard said he hopes Sour Takei has a good Christmas. Sour broke into his baby voice and Howard hung up on him. He said he can't take that baby voice. Howard said people are concerned about Ronnie and Stephanie. He read some email about the way Ronnie treats her. Some people were blaming Stephanie for the way they treat each other. Howard said this one says they're fine. He said arguing doesn't mean that they're not in love.

He played a song parody about Ronnie. Howard said he could read this stuff for 4 hours. Howard said someone said that Ronnie will call people fucking asshole liars if they say something about him. He said that someone wrote that Ronnie will attack people when he knows they are right.

Howard said that Ronnie has been caught lying about the Dean Cain photo. Howard had some feedback about Jeff the Vomit Guy calling in. He said people were upset by that. Robin asked if the Benjy blowing on Richard's cock is going up on the app. Howard said if they don't then they should shut down that app. Howard said someone wrote in complaining about the Wrap Up Show moving to another time. He said he was the only one. Like many who love the Tanners, I first discovered them on the opening credits of Full House, and you can see them in Fuller House, too—in a cutaway in the first episode, for instance, among other times in both series.

According to The Bold Italic, the residents of the Painted Ladies are plagued with drunk people calling for the Tanners in the middle of the night.

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As I visited during the afternoon, I got no such show. Sure, maybe I would have shouted for Uncle Jesse, but as any real Tanner fan knows, the house from the show is elsewhere in the city. Robin Raven Wake up, San Francisco!

I only saw the outside. He did mention that he had plans to make it look like the beloved family really lived there. Catchphrases make us pliable. Alamo Square Park Location: With my veggie burger from VeganBurg and my dream of recreating another part of the show in my heart, I set out a blanket and savored the cool wind in my hair.

I sat in full view of the Painted Ladies, of course. Whatever happened to predictability? Luckily, the old magic of the park is still very much the same as it was on television. There are simply more trees and an overall more polished look to the park. As I savored my lunch, I smiled.