The First Relationship: Infant and Mother by Daniel N. Stern
The Paperback of the The First Relationship: Infant and Mother by Daniel N. Stern at Barnes & Noble. FREE Shipping on $ or more!. Daniel Stern's pathbreaking video-based research into the intimate complexities of mother-infant interaction has had an enormous impact on. Daniel Stern’s pathbreaking video-based research into the intimate complexities of mother–infant interaction has had an enormous impact on psychotherapy and developmental psychology. His minute analyses of the exchanges between mothers and babies have offered empirical support.
We touch on what is now known as well as on the large gray area beyond current knowledge of unknowns and unknown unknowns. Knowns Emotions and Emotional Relationships Human experience is inherently emotional, and human beings experience the world and others in it emotionally. Emotions arise from and form the foundation for many aspects of human attachments, social communication, and prosocial encounters Emde, Contagion, instigation, and exchange of emotions are core features of human interaction, and emotions are powerful intra- and interpersonal regulators of behavior.
Expressing emotions through their voices, faces, and gestures, mothers engage their children, direct and maintain child attention, and build rhythms of expectable dyadic interaction Bornstein, Gini, Putnick, et al. EA likely arises from constitutional needs and organismic development on the one hand and is shaped by situation-specific experiences and contexts on the other. If a mother approaches her infant psychologically in a respectful, accepting, contingent manner, the infant enjoys interacting with her.
The basic behavioral agenda involved in the socialization process is common to all human mothers and infants, unfolds in part automatically, and hopefully results in healthy child outcomes. Regardless of the set of circumstances in which mother and infant find themselves, they must and do interact with each other from the moment the child is conceived.
An Eskimo baby who trusts his mother will learn from her whatever she needs to teach him to survive and prosper in the Eskimo culture, just as the trusting baby in Seoul will learn how to function in Korean society.
An Eskimo or Korean dyad with a less harmonious emotional exchange climate will be hampered in achieving desired socialization goals.
EA describes the open, eager, collaborative, reciprocal communication that can occur between a mother and infant under optimal conditions — regardless of their culture, place of residence, or socioeconomic status.
The Emotional Availability Scales Emotional availability is evaluated through observations and ratings of mother-infant interaction using the Emotional Availability Scales.
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The EA Scales assess specific behaviors of individuals but, at the same time are meant to constitute global ratings of dyads that capture joint interactional style. The scales are flexible with respect to age of child, relationship between child and caregiver, and setting. The EA Scales have been used with children of different ages e. The EA Scales consist of six globally rated dimensions concerned with emotional communication and interaction. Four scales assess maternal behavior: Sensitivity, Structuring, Nonintrusiveness, and Nonhostility.
By the end of the first year, most infants have formed an attachment relationship, usually with the primary caretaker. If parents can adapt to their babies, meet their needs, and provide nurturance, the attachment is secure. Psychosocial development can continue based on a strong foundation of attachment. On the other hand, if a parent's personality and ability to cope with the infant's needs for care are minimal, the relationship is at risk and so is the infant's development. By six to seven months, strong feelings of attachment enable the infant to distinguish between caregivers and strangers.
The infant displays an obvious preference for parents over other caregivers and other unfamiliar people. Anxietydemonstrated by crying, clinging, and turning away from the stranger, is revealed when separation occurs.
This behavior peaks between seven and nine months and again during toddlerhood, when separation may be difficult. Although possibly stressful for the parents, stranger anxiety is a normal sign of healthy child attachment and occurs because of cognitive development.
The First Relationship
Most children develop a secure attachment when reunited with their caregiver after a temporary absence. In contrast, some children with an insecure attachment want to be held, but they are not comfortable; they kick or push away.
Others seem indifferent to the parent's return and ignore them when they return. The quality of the infant's attachment predicts later development. Youngsters who emerge from infancy with a secure attachment stand a better chance of developing happy and healthy relationships with others.
The attachment relationship not only forms the emotional basis for the continued development of the parent-child relationship, but can serve as a foundation for future social connections. Secure infants have parents who sensitively read their infant's cues and respond properly to their needs.
Toddlerhood When children move from infancy into toddlerhood, the parent-child relationship begins to change. During infancy, the primary role of the parent-child relationship is nurturing and predictability, and much of the relationship revolves around the day-to-day demands of caregiving: As youngsters begin to talk and become more mobile during the second and third years of life, however, parents usually try to shape their child's social behavior.
In essence, parents become teachers as well as nurturers, providers of guidance as well as affection. Socialization preparing the youngster to live as a member of a social group implicit during most of the first two years of life, becomes clear as the child moves toward his or her third birthday.
Socialization is an important part of the parent-child relationship. It includes various child-rearing practices, for example weaning, toilet training, and discipline. Dimensions of the parent-child relationship are linked to the child's psychological development, specifically how responsive the parents are, and how demanding they are. Responsive parents are warm and accepting toward their children, enjoying them and trying to see things from their perspective.
In contrast, nonresponsive parents are aloof, rejecting, or critical.
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They show little pleasure in their children and are often insensitive to their emotional needs. Some parents are demanding, while others are too tolerant.
Children's healthy psychological development is facilitated when the parents are both responsive and moderately demanding. During toddlerhood, children often begin to assert their need for autonomy by challenging their parents. Sometimes, the child's newfound assertiveness during the so-called terrible twos can put a strain on the parent-child relationship.
It is important that parents recognize that this behavior is normal for the toddler, and the healthy development of independence is promoted by a parent-child relationship that provides support for the child's developing sense of autonomy. In many regards, the security of the first attachment between infant and parent provides the child with the emotional base to begin exploring the world outside the parent-child relationship. Preschool Various parenting styles evolve during the preschool years.
Preschoolers with authoritative parents are curious about new experiences, focused and skilled at playself-reliant, self-controlled, and cheerful.
School age During the elementary school years, the child becomes increasingly interested in peers, but this is not be a sign of disinterest in the parent-child relationship. Rather, with the natural broadening of psychosocial and cognitive abilities, the child's social world expands to include more people and settings beyond the home environment.
The parent-child relationship remains the most important influence on the child's development. Children whose parents are both responsive and demanding continue to thrive psychologically and socially during the middle childhood years.
During the school years, the parent-child relationship continues to be influenced by the child and the parents. In most families, patterns of interaction between parent and child are well established in the elementary school years.
Adolescence As the child enters adolescencebiological, cognitive, and emotional changes transform the parent-child relationship.The First Relationship Infant and Mother, With a New Introduction
The child's urges for independence may challenge parents' authority. Many parents find early adolescence a difficult period. Adolescents fare best and their parents are happiest when parents can be both encouraging and accepting of the child's needs for more psychological independence.
THE FIRST RELATIONSHIP: Infant and Mother by Daniel Stern | Kirkus Reviews
Although the value of peer relations grows during adolescence, the parent-child relationship remains crucial for the child's psychological development. Authoritative parenting that combines warmth and firmness has the most positive impact on the youngster's development.
Adolescents who have been reared authoritatively continue to show more success in school, better psychological development, and fewer behavior problems. Adolescence may be a time of heightened bickering and diminished closeness in the parent-child relationship, but most disagreements between parents and young teenagers are over less important matters, and most teenagers and parents agree on the essentials.
By late adolescence most children report feeling as close to their parents as they did during elementary school. Parenting styles Parenting has four main styles: Although no parent is consistent in all situations, parents do follow some general tendencies in their approach to childrearing, and it is possible to describe a parent-child relationship by the prevailing style of parenting.
These descriptions provide guidelines for both professionals and parents interested in understanding how variations in the parent-child relationship affect the child's development. Parenting style is shaped by the parent's developmental history, education, and personality; the child's behavior; and the immediate and broader context of the parent's life.
Also, the parent's behavior is influenced by the parent's work, the parents' marriage, family finances, and other conditions likely to affect the parent's behavior and psychological well-being. In addition, parents in different cultures, from different social classes, and from different ethnic groups rear their children differently. In any event, children's behavior and psychological development are linked to the parenting style with which they are raised.
Authoritarian parents Authoritarian parents are rigid in their rules; they expect absolute obedience from the child without any questioning. They also expect the child to accept the family beliefs and principles without questions.
Authoritarian parents are strict disciplinarians, often relying on physical punishment and the withdrawal of affection to shape their child's behavior. Children raised with this parenting style are often moody, unhappy, fearful, and irritable.
They tend to be shy, withdrawn, and lack self-confidence. If affection is withheld, the child commonly is rebellious and antisocial. Authoritative parents Authoritative parents show respect for the opinions of each of their children by allowing them to be different.
Although there are rules in the household, the parents allow discussion if the children do not understand or agree with the rules. These parents make it clear to the children that although they the parents have final authority, some negotiation and compromise may take place.
Authoritative parents are both responsive and demanding; they are firm, but they discipline with love and affection, rather than power, and they are likely to explain rules and expectations to their children instead of simply asserting them.
This style of parenting often results in children who have high self-esteem and are independent, inquisitive, happy, assertive, and interactive. Permissive parents Permissive indulgent parents have little or no control over the behavior of their children.
If any rules exist in the home, they are followed inconsistently.